


New Year's Eve

by DutchRenegade



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Bathroom Chats, Emotions, F/M, New Year's Eve
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-05
Updated: 2021-01-05
Packaged: 2021-03-16 08:33:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28579044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DutchRenegade/pseuds/DutchRenegade
Summary: When Clarke attends Octavia’s New Year’s Eve party, she is very aware that everyone has someone. Not wanting to spoil the mood with her emotions, she ducks into the bathroom a little bit before the countdown. But when someone accidentally stumbles upon her hiding place, she might just have to tell them what's one her mind
Relationships: Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin
Comments: 6
Kudos: 95





	New Year's Eve

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Note: Hope you enjoy this Bellarke one shot. Sometimes the holidays aren't as easy as you want them to be. But remember no matter what you are not alone. Someone will always listen and be there for you. Enjoy
> 
> For Darby, who really really didn't want me to write this about Hermione and Draco instead. So I hope you like it !

**New Year’s Eve**

The house was lively with chatter. The atmosphere was light and fun. Outside the air was crisp but inside there was a warmth that mingled between the guests. Everyone was dressed in their best outfits, just waiting to ring in the new year with high hopes. Octavia and Lincoln were known to throw the best New Year’s Eve party and everyone was enjoying the food, the conversations, and the company. Well almost everyone.

Clarke didn’t want to feel this way. She would much rather be enjoying herself with the people that were basically her family. But something tonight sat in the way. She looked around the living room and glanced into the open kitchen. Everyone was chatting and catching up. Discussing where they had been for the holidays and how their work was going. The plans they had for 2021 and just generally how life was going. Clarke desperately wanted to be part of those conversations, but something in the back of her mind and heart was stopping her.

She couldn’t help but notice everyone was with someone. Octavia was standing with Lincoln. They were congratulation Harper and Monty on the pregnancy that was well underway. Murphy and Emori were talking to Raven and Shaw about something space travel related that had been the largest news story of the past few months. Maya was sitting on the couch as Jasper had gotten up to get them both another drink. Even Madi was at Luca’s house tonight to celebrate the incoming of a new year. And she hadn’t wanted to bother her mother and Marcus either after already having spent a week there for Christmas.

Somehow, in this room full of people she loved so dearly, she felt utterly alone. She watched the hands of the clock tick away. Made some small talk with Harper and Maya about what gender they thought the baby might be. She helped Octavia serve some warm appetizers. And made sure to make a good dent in the bottle of rum she had brought.

It was just after eleven. If it was up to her, she could just go to sleep. Maybe she could disappear into the guest room. Or take a breather in the backyard. But her feet carried her to the bathroom. She shut the door behind her. There were a few options. But she opted to let herself slide down into the empty bathtub. Her legs curled close to her body.

“Come on, Clarke. Now would be a really good time to snap out of it like you normally do and just go have some fun. Enjoy it while you can…” she told herself out loud. She sighed. It was always easier said than done.

A few minutes passed she was sure. She took another sip straight from the bottle she had brought with her. She winced a little. “Should have brought a bottle of coke too,” she spoke to the towel rack.

Suddenly the door opened. Instantly Clarke’s face went red. Now she was not only the party pooper with emotions, but now she was caught red handed drinking alone in a bathtub at her best friend’s NYE party.

“I’m so sorry, I’ll go upstairs,” a voice said from the half open doorway. Before she could say anything in response, the voice continued. “Clarke? What are you doing in the bathtub?” She finally looked up at who had witnessed her moment of self-pity. Bellamy.

He smiled. “You okay there?” he asked as she didn’t answer his first question.

She realized she hadn’t responded. “Oh yah, I’m fine. Just had to take a moment for myself I guess.”

Bellamy nodded like he understood. “You want to talk about it?”

Clarke took a moment to think about the question. She really didn’t. She didn’t want to burden someone with feelings she didn’t understand herself. She didn’t want to ruin the mood. And yet she felt deep down that maybe talking about it would help somehow.

She sighed. “I’m good. Just having a lonely sad potato moment,” she finally chose to say. Out of all the things, that is what came out of her mouth. Perhaps she should put the bottle of rum down for a little while. Bellamy gave her a funny look, but then his features turned softer.

“Alright Griffin, this I need to hear,” he said. To her surprise he shut the door behind him and walked over. He let himself flop into the bathtub as well, his legs hanging over the edge. “Let me hear it, I’m all ears.” He was being sincere. “Safe space,” he motioned around the bathroom. This got a small smile from her.

Clarke knew there was no going back. She had known Bellamy for a long time. He was easy to talk to. And perhaps getting things out in the open was what she needed.

“I…I don’t know…just the holidays getting to me I guess,” she began. Bellamy nodded again. “I guess I just needed a moment to myself. Everyone out there is so happy and I just needed a moment to…not be” she finished. That was it. That was the simple truth.

“I get that, I do. I was looking for just that when I accidentally found you,” Bellamy responded admittingly. “I’ve been here for less than twenty minutes and all I have been asked is if I’m doing alright,” he spoke. His tone slightly sad and frustrated at the same time. “Don’t get me wrong, I understand a breakup at this time of year makes people feel extra bad for you but it was Thanksgiving. I’m over it. I just want to move on,” he added.

Clarke remembered hearing from Octavia that Bellamy and Gina had broken up after a fight following Thanksgiving dinner at Gina’s parents’ house. It had been a bit messy to say the least. “Sorry,” she said without thinking.

“No, none of that. I thought this bathroom was a safe space. So no sorry looks or apologizing,” Bellamy said matter of fact. “Plus we were talking about why you are a sad potato, not me.”

Clarke snickered at his word choice. “Darn, was hoping you wouldn’t notice.” Bellamy motioned for her to continue. She sat up a little straighter, and fiddled with the bottle cap as she continued. “Is it dumb that seeing everyone together with their significant other makes me sad?”

“No, sounds human to me.”

“Well, I think that’s all it is. Just seeing everyone together, having a good time. Sometimes it makes me wonder what is wrong with me. Why am I not being adored by someone like Lincoln adores your sister? Or why does no one seem to want to plan a future with me like Monty and Harper? Just makes me feel a little left out I guess,” she said. There was a wave of hurt coming up in her. She was not often the emotional type. She stayed strong during hard times for the sake of others. She pushed her emotions down to be able to deal with situations with her head. People often looked at her as a leader, or as someone who made hard decisions no one else wanted to make. But that wasn’t always her choice. Nor was it easy to always be that person. Sometimes she broke too. Sometimes it was all a little much. And sometimes she just needed someone to hold her while she cried and tell her that she was trying her best and that that was enough.

“There’s nothing wrong with you Clarke,” Bellamy answered. “It’s normal to feel a little left out when literally everyone around you is sickeningly happy,” he added, sounding a little salty himself. He put his hand out, the universal sign of _please hand me that bottle_. Clarke obliged and handed over the rum bottle. He took a swig and handed it back. Clarke took a shot herself. They both laughed.

“Well this isn’t how I imagined my new year’s eve going,” Clarke admitted. Bellamy agreed. There were tears beginning to well up in her eyes. She could feel them beginning to settle in the bottom corners of her eyes. Slowly pooling and causing her vision to blur slightly. The guy on the other side of the tub becoming a blur of dark curls.

“Hey, hey,” Bellamy said. He laid a hand on her knee. It was warm there. Like a small wake flame becoming the start of a burning inferno. He lingered there, not moving. He squeezed gently, bringing her attention back to him in that bathroom. She laid her own hand on top. Her fingers softly falling on his.

They sat there for a while, not saying a word. Just sitting in mutual understanding of their feelings. Letting each of them sit in their small bit of sadness, but doing so together, making it a little easier.

“You know, we could just ring in the new year here. No one will miss us anyway,” Clarke mumbled. A tear finally rolling down her cheek. She was breaking at the seams. Slowly falling further and further apart. Only keeping together by the sheer knowledge of not wanting to appear weak in front of others.

“First of all, that’s not true. I’m sure they are already wondering where you are. Second of all, if we sit here much longer, we will be bringing in the gloriously blank canvas of twenty-twenty-one in a bathroom. Which doesn’t sound like a great start. And thirdly, how about I’ll be right there. Ringing in the new year right by your side.” Bellamy started to get up. “I’ll even be your New Year’s Eve kiss if you want?” He added the last sentence quietly, while facing the door. Clarke had to double check she hadn’t imagined it. Her eyes went slightly wide.

“I mean…just as friends. You know, just so we don’t both have to stand there awkwardly while everyone else does it,” he stammered, trying to explain himself.

“You know what, sounds good,” Clarke said as she wiped the tear from her cheek. She took a deep breath.

From the other side of the door they heard a commotion, the countdown was almost here. Bellamy cracked the door open. Jasper was calling everyone to the living room to watch the ball drop on their tv screen. Bellamy reached out his hand to help Clarke up.

_“TEN”_

She took his hand and felt him easily pull her out of the tub.

_“NINE”_

Clarke lost her balance while her feet tried to find the floor. Preparing to wipe out, she felt her weight shift instead. Bellamy’s arm wrapping around her waist.

_“EIGHT”_

_“SEVEN”_

She looked up, only inches from Bellamy’s face. She noticed his eyes. They had a slight twinkle in them.

_“SIX”_

_“FIVE”_

A breath hitched in her throat; she wasn’t sure why she suddenly was so aware of his arm around her waist. His muscles holding her without much effort.

_“FOUR”_

Neither one broke eye contact. Unaware they were slowly closing the small space between one another.

_“THREE”_

The door suddenly flung all the way open.

_“TWO”_

“There you guys are-” Octavia said as she burst through the bathroom door. She was dragging Lincoln along. Her eyes went wide and she immediately turned back around. Clarke pulled back out of surprise.

_“ONE_ ”

_“Happy New Year!”_ A cluster of voices shouted excitedly from the living room. A few crackers were set off and people pulled one another into hugs and kisses.

Clarke cleared her throat. She was well aware that their moment was over. It had been just a fleeting second of rum induced closeness. Fueled by the need to be close to someone when the clock struck midnight.

“Happy new year, Bell,” she said. “Thanks for listening,” she added as she reached for the open door.

“Clarke,” Bellamy said, his voice changed. There was something else now. Something new. Something full of desire. His breath was deep.

Clarke’s hand reached for the doorknob. Ready to greet her friends and wish everyone in the house a happy new year. Ready to rejoin the rest of the party. But her hand didn’t reach the doorknob. Bellamy gently grabbed her arm. Then whirled her to face him again. Before she could respond or react, his arms were wrapped tightly around her waist. He pulled her in close. His lips landed on hers. They were soft and warm. She kissed him back.

Her hand reached to his face and pulled him even closer. Her hand soft on his cheek. The kiss was passionate. His lips tasted slightly of rum. She smiled against his lips. Bellamy suddenly pulled away.

“Uhm, sorry…” he scratched his head. He was looking for other words. “I told you they would miss you. Happy new yea-” he barely finished his sentence before Clarke cut him off.

“This is safe space, no apologies,” she said teasingly with a smile. She put her arms around his neck and lifted herself onto her tiptoes. And pulled him into another kiss.


End file.
